There can be many reasons why we choose to stay friends with an ex, but for all our good intentions, we often find that the concept of friendship with an ex can be difficult to contend with, and often, it’s a good idea to ensure there is some distance between us and our ex-partner, especially during the start of a break-up.
It’s More Than Sex
When ex-partners are at a loose end, it can be tempting to touch base with an ex to scratch an itch, only to find that more damage is done in the process. As such, you should get out the habit of messaging an ex-partner when you have urges and focus on other outlets that don’t have the emotional consequences of sleeping with an ex-partner.
It’s easy to scoff at the idea of introducing sex toys into a single lifestyle, but some are designed for this very purpose. The world has come a long way in its viewpoints on sex, so regardless of where you’re looking for adult DVDs or Japanese sex dolls, there were always be a toy available.
You Broke Up for a Reason
A fresh break-up often comes with a wave of emotions, and in some instances, we start thinking irrationally. Regardless of why the break-up occurred, it occurred for a reason, which sometimes means it can be difficult to maintain a friendship.
Of course, where children are involved, it’s essential that all parties are civil and friendly, but this is very different than trying to maintain a close relationship like a friendship.
They Still Love You, Or You Still Love Them
Forming a friendship may seem like the ideal way of continuing a relationship with some we still love, but it can have the opposite effect. Strong emotions such as love can mean we act in erratic ways and staying friends with someone can mean that they are still a part of our lives.
However, watching our ex-partner move on while we skulk in the background means that we’re causing ourselves more emotional harm, making the recovery time much longer.
It’s Harder to Move On
Many of us with suffer from a series of upsets in life, and while some occurrences can affect us emotionally, many of us are able to move on and readjust to life.
Remaining friends with an ex-partner can often mean we’re faced with daily reminders of the broken relationship, making it harder for either party to move on.
It can be difficult to accept that an ex-partner no longer wants us in their life but reminding ourselves of this constantly means that emotional scarring takes longer to heal.
Change is Unlikely to Occur
If an ex-partner is trying to win us back, staying friends will often be a suggestion that’s made. However, if the relationship broke down due to trust issues, you may seem the same patterns occurring, leaving you in the same position as you were when in a relationship.
These traits don’t mean the other person is at fault, but it’s important to be realistic as to whether forming another relationship is the way forward.
A relationship breakdown is never easy to endure, but it’s important that we’re able to safeguard ourselves emotionally, and not rely on ex-partners as a pacifier for the more difficult periods.